Oh, I just love my family!!! I really do!! Especially the selective sharing they achieve. Who knows? I may just be thinking all crazy like I have been told in the past every time I share real raw feelings with DH (of which I stopped because there is only so many times someone can tell me that I am thinking out of my backside because it really hurts my feelings that I am entitled to have). Yep, what I am going to share today is my perception because when this happens..... nobody outside my little family unit sees it. So here we go....
DH used to be quite helpful around here. Used to be. If I was falling behind on my housework duties, being a housewife and all, he would step up and help me. If there was vacuuming that needed to be done, some laundry done, and even the dishes... he would step up and help me out. Even when we would have leftovers from dinner, he would wrap them up to put them in the fridge for me. Well, those days are gone! Not completely gone, mind you, just taking a selective path of being gone. Last night was a glaring example of what I mean....
I made dinner, as usual here, and pulled out the necessary condiments that were for that evening's meal. After everyone ate, DH got up to put away his dish in the sink and proceeded to put away only the condiment he used and left the rest out on the counter. Then, he placed his dish in the sink and walked away. Really? Just the one condiment he used and NOT the others that were sitting near it?? It is not really all that hard to put the other stuff in the fridge for me if they are all just mere inches from the fridge. NOPE! He chooses to leave everything else out for me to take care of. Not really being all that helpful after all.... just the very minimum. But who am I to complain? Did he not put something away for me? Shouldn't I be happy about it? Nah, I will just finish the job.... as usual.
DD is an interesting bird.... We go grocery shopping every week and it appears that she chooses a snack for the week that she will not eat and choose to eat mine until it is GONE before eating hers. Normally, I do not complain all that much about this since I am on the perpetual diet, but DANG, I really like my Fiber One snack bars! That is the one thing I get to look forward to and I see empty wrappers EVERYWHERE! But if I was to take something of hers (since she also usually picks a healthy snack)... she gets bent over it! Oh, that's right..... I just work here and should not get to have anything good, hot, or be able to eat a complete meal in peace because the demand of the job states that. No wonder I cannot lose weight.... out of complete frustration..... I go the the local 7-11 and buy junk food to soothe my frazzled nerves instead. Darn emotional eating!!!!! I am DOOMED!!!!
Of course, I just could not end this on such a negative note.... My family does share in other things.... Like, for instance, they share with me their nasty attitude, their animosity towards what I am forced to make (according to the weekly shopping list we make together every week), their ability to make this house look like a bomb went off, and their complete disregard that I have things to do around here and not all of it is to pamper them. Yep, I get demands of clipping toenails, blow drying hair straight and other personal demands up the wazoo! Especially when I am in a time crunch. It is guaranteed that I always have to drive, I always have to cater to them (sick, healthy or otherwise), and take criticism with a smile. Feelings? Oh, I am not allowed to have actual feelings around here. Heck, I cannot have down time... period. I always have to be on my "A" game at all times. I have neighbors that their wives can have a beer (or many) on any given night and even be left alone to nurse a hangover, but I am not allowed! Not saying I would like to be getting drunk all the time to get a hangover, but even my once-in-a-blue-moon allowance to go out and see my friends comes with expectations. So, being sick, needing down time, or sharing feelings are big no-no's here. Everyone else can have them.... just not me. Just once I would like to let this apparent freak flag fly (that is what they see me sharing my feelings as well as any semblance of punishment for letting loose consists of) and not care what happens next, but sadly I care far too much and I am actually kind-of tired of the ridicule around here. Oh well, off to do what I do. Thanks for reading and have an exceptional day!!
Monday, September 30, 2013
Friday, September 27, 2013
Clearly, I need an intervention.....
Okay, I know that I happen to go through stages of extremes like a food jag to a small child. These hobbies I happen to have are seriously getting out of hand!! Lets begin at the beginning... shall we?
I remember the saying, "idle minds and idle hands are the main ingredient to chaos not welcome". Okay, you probably never heard that saying exactly, but you get the idea, right? As like an ex-smoker turning to food because of the hand-to-mouth reflex, we seem to find something to take place of something else. For me? These hobbies stave off boredom, frustration, and stress. Trust me... if I was left in a room with nothing to keep my hands and mind entertained... I would probably go batty!
My hobbies started off as innocent things. Years ago, I taught myself how to paint on glass to fill the hours/days DH was away on his fishing trips each year. I did that so apparently well that people wanted to buy what I managed to paint. I did a few years on the craft sale/fundraiser front and started to hate painting on glass when the demand got too high. In order to curb my glass painting issue, I took up jewelry making for a while. Nothing real Earth-shattering, just a few necklaces and bracelets and some simple earrings. Of course, my tastes in materials was a bit expensive and I just lacked the patience to go beyond the simple stuff, so stopping for a while was easy. Then, I went into a crocheting frenzy when I learned how to crochet a hat. I still have the hats to prove I was becoming a fan of yarn a little too much. Then, the interest in books and reading took center stage for a second round. I was an avid reader in my 20's and early 30's, but I was genre-stuck and there are really only so many mysteries/suspense/sci-fi books my mind could take. Suddenly, I became a rabid fan of romance novels and that scared me to no end! I swore I would never read that sappy trash, but I fell victim to the happily ever afters and I am still hooked! Fortunately, my feverish pace of reading a book in a day was slowed down considerably, but I discovered, or better yet rediscovered an old hobby and it is truly getting out of hand! It is called jewelry making/beads. I seriously have a beading addiction!! I have taken classes on working with the one type of beads I swore I would never work with.... seed beads! Heck, the size I am using is considered the smallest out there (size 15) and the results are impressive! They are wearable works of art!! People are wanting me to sell my stuff again! Over the past month, I have made roughly 30 pairs of earrings, a few necklaces and beaded charms galore! My dining room table is covered in beads and projects. I go to the bead store and/or the craft store at least twice a week to buy more beads, thread and crystals. My eyesight is shot and I rarely step away from a project. Everything I have made, people want one, too and I have obliged in making them one. I think my mom has one of everything I have managed to make so far and even she is feeling the pinch in the pocketbook. Every item I have made is something I will proudly wear and I am not sure if I could sell any of it, but I think DH is nearing the point of telling me to do just that! I have far too much wearable art for one person. EEK!
Of course, the season is changing and I will get back to crocheting again. I have an afghan that I did not finish yet. It takes a lot of yarn to make and I am not even half way done and I have gone through 9 skeins of yarn. Trust me when I say this.... it is thick, fluffy and extremely warm.
Sadly, I could not share pictures of the extreme need of this intervention because I cannot find my camera, but if I did..... You would be preparing the padded room for me as you read this.
I will say this, though..... With all these hobbies I happen to have.... I feel quite calm while everything else is crumbling around me. I guess that is an upside to everything, right?
Thanks for reading and have a great day! As for me.... I have a few more little beading projects to finish and then I have a new book to read as well as getting my crocheting projects in order for this fall. Yep, I definitely need an intervention, but I seem to be in my "happy place" when I am immersed in the crafting world....
I remember the saying, "idle minds and idle hands are the main ingredient to chaos not welcome". Okay, you probably never heard that saying exactly, but you get the idea, right? As like an ex-smoker turning to food because of the hand-to-mouth reflex, we seem to find something to take place of something else. For me? These hobbies stave off boredom, frustration, and stress. Trust me... if I was left in a room with nothing to keep my hands and mind entertained... I would probably go batty!
My hobbies started off as innocent things. Years ago, I taught myself how to paint on glass to fill the hours/days DH was away on his fishing trips each year. I did that so apparently well that people wanted to buy what I managed to paint. I did a few years on the craft sale/fundraiser front and started to hate painting on glass when the demand got too high. In order to curb my glass painting issue, I took up jewelry making for a while. Nothing real Earth-shattering, just a few necklaces and bracelets and some simple earrings. Of course, my tastes in materials was a bit expensive and I just lacked the patience to go beyond the simple stuff, so stopping for a while was easy. Then, I went into a crocheting frenzy when I learned how to crochet a hat. I still have the hats to prove I was becoming a fan of yarn a little too much. Then, the interest in books and reading took center stage for a second round. I was an avid reader in my 20's and early 30's, but I was genre-stuck and there are really only so many mysteries/suspense/sci-fi books my mind could take. Suddenly, I became a rabid fan of romance novels and that scared me to no end! I swore I would never read that sappy trash, but I fell victim to the happily ever afters and I am still hooked! Fortunately, my feverish pace of reading a book in a day was slowed down considerably, but I discovered, or better yet rediscovered an old hobby and it is truly getting out of hand! It is called jewelry making/beads. I seriously have a beading addiction!! I have taken classes on working with the one type of beads I swore I would never work with.... seed beads! Heck, the size I am using is considered the smallest out there (size 15) and the results are impressive! They are wearable works of art!! People are wanting me to sell my stuff again! Over the past month, I have made roughly 30 pairs of earrings, a few necklaces and beaded charms galore! My dining room table is covered in beads and projects. I go to the bead store and/or the craft store at least twice a week to buy more beads, thread and crystals. My eyesight is shot and I rarely step away from a project. Everything I have made, people want one, too and I have obliged in making them one. I think my mom has one of everything I have managed to make so far and even she is feeling the pinch in the pocketbook. Every item I have made is something I will proudly wear and I am not sure if I could sell any of it, but I think DH is nearing the point of telling me to do just that! I have far too much wearable art for one person. EEK!
Of course, the season is changing and I will get back to crocheting again. I have an afghan that I did not finish yet. It takes a lot of yarn to make and I am not even half way done and I have gone through 9 skeins of yarn. Trust me when I say this.... it is thick, fluffy and extremely warm.
Sadly, I could not share pictures of the extreme need of this intervention because I cannot find my camera, but if I did..... You would be preparing the padded room for me as you read this.
I will say this, though..... With all these hobbies I happen to have.... I feel quite calm while everything else is crumbling around me. I guess that is an upside to everything, right?
Thanks for reading and have a great day! As for me.... I have a few more little beading projects to finish and then I have a new book to read as well as getting my crocheting projects in order for this fall. Yep, I definitely need an intervention, but I seem to be in my "happy place" when I am immersed in the crafting world....
Friday, September 13, 2013
A pinch of this and too much of that....
Good morning! Just a quick blog to get the day rolling...
Well, lets see... Since my last blog, my life has been pretty uneventful and eventful in the same breath. I have been called in to the salon to take care of a few clients that could not make it in on my usual day that I commit to.... Saturday. I have hit the pinnacle of what my best friend warned me about... My hobbies are catching up with me. Between the hours of my day, I fit in reading, bead work, and feverishly waiting for the new season of Castle by watching all of the reruns on TV via "on demand" through my cable provider. Sure, I fit in some cleaning and I have been thoroughly committed to cooking for my picky eating family (since they don't cook and would starve if I stopped cooking for them..LOL). I was supposed to start a new diet that has been around for a while and proven effective to some people. The only reason I am trying this diet is because it is the only one I have not tried out of the countless ones that seemed to have failed me. Of course, I had to try to start this plan at the worst possible time and with the worst possible situation to deal with. Picture this.... A holiday weekend with the whole family home and their picky demands dictate we need to eat what is NOT on the required foods list. Yep, it's looking like its never gonna happen here. In fact, it has not happened and the holiday weekend is long past.
I did learn something recently and I am not all that thrilled about it when it comes to feeding my family. One person's diet restrictions are not good for all. DH is on a low sodium diet because he needs his blood pressure controlled. Well, low sodium diets are not good for a healthy teenager since she already has low blood pressure to begin with. In fact, at a recent visit to see the doctor about these recent "dizzy spells" that DD has been having, I learned that what I am feeding DH is not benefiting DD in any way. Of course, DH's diet restrictions don't affect me either way, but trying to make healthy meals out of his choice of consumable foods is not helping my waistline one bit according to this new diet plan I wanted to try. I have tried to just get back on the "salad train" and I am just not feeling all that motivated to eat like a rabbit. I know my portion control is in check. In fact, I think I am under-eating if that is remotely possible. Feeling like I am drowning internally with all that water I am drinking and there is still no change on the scale. Maybe I am going through the beginning stages of menopause since weight gain in inevitable anyway. Just not pleased about that one bit, I tell you.
I did get a compliment from a friend that I look just fine the way I am, but really.... a friend will say anything mood-lifting because that is what friends do. It would be nice to know from a stranger, but fishing for compliments from a stranger is creepy, so I will just accept the compliment and still not believe in it.
Oh, the whole diet thing I have mentioned? I apologize for sharing that. I wanted to avoid sharing my personal little hell in the battle of the bulge here. Of course, DD is suffering the ailment that all women suffer.... Attaining the "ideal" physique. And what I mean by "ideal" is what is shared after being "photoshopped" in magazines. Sure, it is nice to see perfection, but the drive to attain it because we all know that is what people prefer to see is another thing in itself. In fact, I have seen the creature it creates. It has green eyes of jealousy and black heart. I should know.... I look at it in the mirror every morning. In the pictures that I have seen of me... I see the broken person that I have become because of it. With all of the effort I put in to DD's life, I cannot seem to compete with media outlets.
I also need to apologize for the menopause comment. Really, who needs to hear about something that happens to all women anyway and the personal hell we go through. Sure, the story of hot flashes might be hilarious, but everything else is just misery intensified.
Now, the whole issue with my hobbies taking over my life.... I have a few hobbies I turn to in order to escape the stress of the day. I read way too much these days, but at least the feverish pace of a book a day has gone down a little. I now savor it for a few days. I do some things with beads. I have made many necklaces, earrings and bracelets over the past few years or so. It started off as simple stuff and now I am working with beads so small that even with my glasses on, I barely see the hole in which to string them. Maybe I will post some pictures in the future of that, once I find my camera again, that is. Then there is my painting on glass habit. Usually, in the fall I start that hobby. Hand-painted glass ornaments are what I do a lot of these days. I used to paint on glasses and vases, but it is cheaper to buy a box of glass ornaments from the hobby store and it keeps me busy for about an hour or two for a box. Then, I even grasped onto yet another old hobby and I have tons of yarn in my home to prove it.... I have been crocheting again. Yep, another habit I pull out in the fall and work on that until my hands cramp up. I have crocheted hats, scarves and I am working on a blanket, too. I learned some of my crocheting abilities on YouTube and chances are I will be back to maybe finishing that blanket this year. Of course, I chose a pattern that takes roughly triple the amount of yarn to make it and I am not even half-way done. I hope I finish it this year.
While it is great to have a creative outlet, it is not that healthy when that creative outlet takes over most of my day. I guess that when I was told that I am an "all or nothing" personality.... they were right. Thinking about it now.... I am one that never gives up much. While DH can drive me absolutely batty, I keep trying to make things better. While DD is stubborn, I am relentless in keeping her in check. When it comes to a diet, I am either all in and following the instructions to a "T", or I am so off the diet wagon that I do deserve those pitiful looks heavy people get in public. Even with my hobbies.... I am either bordering a one-person factory or I am not finishing what I started. Yep, just an average person that happens to have the symptoms of ADD, OCD, ADHD and whatever crazed disorder there is, but completely normal at the same time.
Oh well, time to get this day going. I have a pair of earrings I need to finish, fix a key chain for a co-worker, some laundry to do, a bit of cleaning in the house to attend to, and fit in a few chapters of this new book I got on my Kindle. Then I have 2 meals to prepare today since I made the mistake of using the fast to make stuff when I was at the hair show this past weekend and since I have to work tomorrow... I need a quick meal to make for after work so DH does not pull out his exceptional whining abilities of starving to death when I get home. Yep, just another day in the life of a person that chooses to do too much.
Thanks for reading and have a great day!!!!
Well, lets see... Since my last blog, my life has been pretty uneventful and eventful in the same breath. I have been called in to the salon to take care of a few clients that could not make it in on my usual day that I commit to.... Saturday. I have hit the pinnacle of what my best friend warned me about... My hobbies are catching up with me. Between the hours of my day, I fit in reading, bead work, and feverishly waiting for the new season of Castle by watching all of the reruns on TV via "on demand" through my cable provider. Sure, I fit in some cleaning and I have been thoroughly committed to cooking for my picky eating family (since they don't cook and would starve if I stopped cooking for them..LOL). I was supposed to start a new diet that has been around for a while and proven effective to some people. The only reason I am trying this diet is because it is the only one I have not tried out of the countless ones that seemed to have failed me. Of course, I had to try to start this plan at the worst possible time and with the worst possible situation to deal with. Picture this.... A holiday weekend with the whole family home and their picky demands dictate we need to eat what is NOT on the required foods list. Yep, it's looking like its never gonna happen here. In fact, it has not happened and the holiday weekend is long past.
I did learn something recently and I am not all that thrilled about it when it comes to feeding my family. One person's diet restrictions are not good for all. DH is on a low sodium diet because he needs his blood pressure controlled. Well, low sodium diets are not good for a healthy teenager since she already has low blood pressure to begin with. In fact, at a recent visit to see the doctor about these recent "dizzy spells" that DD has been having, I learned that what I am feeding DH is not benefiting DD in any way. Of course, DH's diet restrictions don't affect me either way, but trying to make healthy meals out of his choice of consumable foods is not helping my waistline one bit according to this new diet plan I wanted to try. I have tried to just get back on the "salad train" and I am just not feeling all that motivated to eat like a rabbit. I know my portion control is in check. In fact, I think I am under-eating if that is remotely possible. Feeling like I am drowning internally with all that water I am drinking and there is still no change on the scale. Maybe I am going through the beginning stages of menopause since weight gain in inevitable anyway. Just not pleased about that one bit, I tell you.
I did get a compliment from a friend that I look just fine the way I am, but really.... a friend will say anything mood-lifting because that is what friends do. It would be nice to know from a stranger, but fishing for compliments from a stranger is creepy, so I will just accept the compliment and still not believe in it.
Oh, the whole diet thing I have mentioned? I apologize for sharing that. I wanted to avoid sharing my personal little hell in the battle of the bulge here. Of course, DD is suffering the ailment that all women suffer.... Attaining the "ideal" physique. And what I mean by "ideal" is what is shared after being "photoshopped" in magazines. Sure, it is nice to see perfection, but the drive to attain it because we all know that is what people prefer to see is another thing in itself. In fact, I have seen the creature it creates. It has green eyes of jealousy and black heart. I should know.... I look at it in the mirror every morning. In the pictures that I have seen of me... I see the broken person that I have become because of it. With all of the effort I put in to DD's life, I cannot seem to compete with media outlets.
I also need to apologize for the menopause comment. Really, who needs to hear about something that happens to all women anyway and the personal hell we go through. Sure, the story of hot flashes might be hilarious, but everything else is just misery intensified.
Now, the whole issue with my hobbies taking over my life.... I have a few hobbies I turn to in order to escape the stress of the day. I read way too much these days, but at least the feverish pace of a book a day has gone down a little. I now savor it for a few days. I do some things with beads. I have made many necklaces, earrings and bracelets over the past few years or so. It started off as simple stuff and now I am working with beads so small that even with my glasses on, I barely see the hole in which to string them. Maybe I will post some pictures in the future of that, once I find my camera again, that is. Then there is my painting on glass habit. Usually, in the fall I start that hobby. Hand-painted glass ornaments are what I do a lot of these days. I used to paint on glasses and vases, but it is cheaper to buy a box of glass ornaments from the hobby store and it keeps me busy for about an hour or two for a box. Then, I even grasped onto yet another old hobby and I have tons of yarn in my home to prove it.... I have been crocheting again. Yep, another habit I pull out in the fall and work on that until my hands cramp up. I have crocheted hats, scarves and I am working on a blanket, too. I learned some of my crocheting abilities on YouTube and chances are I will be back to maybe finishing that blanket this year. Of course, I chose a pattern that takes roughly triple the amount of yarn to make it and I am not even half-way done. I hope I finish it this year.
While it is great to have a creative outlet, it is not that healthy when that creative outlet takes over most of my day. I guess that when I was told that I am an "all or nothing" personality.... they were right. Thinking about it now.... I am one that never gives up much. While DH can drive me absolutely batty, I keep trying to make things better. While DD is stubborn, I am relentless in keeping her in check. When it comes to a diet, I am either all in and following the instructions to a "T", or I am so off the diet wagon that I do deserve those pitiful looks heavy people get in public. Even with my hobbies.... I am either bordering a one-person factory or I am not finishing what I started. Yep, just an average person that happens to have the symptoms of ADD, OCD, ADHD and whatever crazed disorder there is, but completely normal at the same time.
Oh well, time to get this day going. I have a pair of earrings I need to finish, fix a key chain for a co-worker, some laundry to do, a bit of cleaning in the house to attend to, and fit in a few chapters of this new book I got on my Kindle. Then I have 2 meals to prepare today since I made the mistake of using the fast to make stuff when I was at the hair show this past weekend and since I have to work tomorrow... I need a quick meal to make for after work so DH does not pull out his exceptional whining abilities of starving to death when I get home. Yep, just another day in the life of a person that chooses to do too much.
Thanks for reading and have a great day!!!!
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