Last night, I got a call from my best friend. Her voice echoed the tone of something important needed to be done. She requested that we get together really soon and that there is no room for being all that relaxed about it.... Time is limited and she really wants to spend some time with me.
While I am fully aware that she got a job offer in another state and is planning on moving there, I figured that we still have time. I thought that her plans were to go there late in the summer, but I was quickly corrected. She is starting to pack up to leave. The time is nearing and is far sooner than I was prepared for. The job she was offered and graciously accepted needs her ASAP. She is currently in the process of tying some loose ends with the part time job being a Nanny. In fact, there are a couple of part time jobs she happens to have. The pay has not been where it needs to be and struggling financially has hit the point to where she needs to say goodbye to what has been her life for years. This new job is something completely different and this is a chance to make enough money to really be self-sufficient in every sense of the word.
As she is aware that there is really no solid support system in place to where she is going, she is taking the leap of faith that everything will work out for the best. Leaving friends and most of her family behind, she is to set off to another state to stay with her brother and his fiance' until there is enough money to find a place of her own. Her parents have been her solid rock offering her shelter and assistance to her bills while she has been struggling to make ends meet. The moment she moves out.... that support is gone and she is responsible to make this new venture work... it has to work. There is no turning back in her eyes.
Her initial move is a small one. Just a bag or two of clothes, her car and some basic necessities. Once she finds a place of her own... she is returning to pack up all her belongings and haul it to her new place (which includes her two birds that she sees as her children).
As I talk to her, thinking we still had more time... I get informed that her moving date is quite close. In fact, it has been moved up. The end of June is the latest date she is allowed to have to get moved. With the potential of making a stable wage, I know that she is not going to have these people wait. She needs to be trained for this job. With mere weeks left to see my friend's face, the time is now to get in as much face time as I can. She is my best friend. She is the one I call when I need to vent. She is the friend that never lets me go out alone if I need a little time and a few beers to decompress from the stress of life. She is my cycling buddy for our annual 25 mile ride through the streets of Chicago (of which we are obviously not going to do anymore). She is the friend that keeps my secrets, makes me laugh when I want to cry and understands me better than anyone else on this planet. It took years to build a friendship like ours. We are more like sisters than friends... we are family. She is called "Aunt" by my daughter, and she is always the first one to offer assistance when needed. This type of friendship is so balanced that it saddens me that those days are numbered. While we can still call, write, or e-mail as a means of communication... it is nothing like the personal time that you spend in the presence of one another. The hug when I need one will never be given by her. The punch in the arm when frustration sets in will no longer come from her. Well, when it came to the punching... I can breathe a sigh of relief that she cannot "knuckle punch" me from over 1,000 miles away...LOL.
What makes this so hard for me is that I am not a young girl anymore. Friends come and go, but true friends are those that take take years of effort to create. I am not sure if life offers that many years at my age to build another friendship like I have with her, and if I have that much effort left in me to try again. Having her as my best friend has been effortless and I really like that. I understand the importance of feeling financially sound and she deserves far better than what life in Illinois has offered. I just would have liked that opportunities like the one she has been offered could have been available here so she would not have to move away. As I do happen to have plenty of friends, I just do not have a friend that can become like family. To be so understood on both sides that there is virtually no need to explain themselves.
Of course, she is slightly freaking out. She now has to find a person to cut her hair the right way. She has trusted me with that job for years. Beyond that, she is going to have to deal with leaving her best friend behind. I believe that things will stay strong between the two of us, but the distance is going to be a challenge. I will have to do things on my own, like shopping, without her input. She knows I hate shopping for myself. Or to go out and have a beer when the need strikes. Not too many of my other friends are local to just join me and have other friends they hang with all the time. Yep, life as I know it is going to change and I am still not ready to let go of what I know....
Thanks for reading.... have a great day!
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