Good morning!
I have been blogging with with site for quite a while and I have managed to share my thoughts with my friends via Facebook for almost just as long, but now I can't. Apparently Google+ is all the rage and I really have no interest in this form of social media. So those simple days of just clicking "Share with Facebook" are now long gone. Probably because I now rarely have the blogging gene in me that this change happened without my knowledge. I have searched the help section to find a way to get my blog back to what it was when I started, but apparently I am not allowed the option, AND not allowed to easily find a solution.
Maybe the day has finally come that I just give up trying to share thought this way. I will, though, make one feeble attempt to share this on Facebook and see if what I have tried has managed to make this work. If not? Well, if you happen to be more computer savvy than I am, then welcome to my blogging page.
Okay, here I go with some much needed release and probably some less than positive thoughts being shared. Please keep in mind that this blog is about MY THOUGHTS and are in no way backed with research or published findings. I happen to know that there are quite a few fact checkers out there that will dispute, nitpick, or dissect what I have to share in some shape or form to point out the many faults I happen to have. That usually ranges from my political views and trickles down to my choice of music or my favorite food choice. Just keep in mind that these are MY THOUGHTS AND MY OPINIONS and there will obviously something remotely entertaining here. Doubtful, but a person can hope, right? Especially when my misery is considered entertaining, so here goes.....
Money is tight in my household. Of course, it is tight just about everywhere else, but in my situation?..... It is downright painful. Cost of living, taxes and the job market have wreaked major havoc here. I have been looking for more stable income to help my family for YEARS, but sadly, the job market is more of an "employers market" than an "employees market". College degrees AND on the job experience are requirements and no longer are the days of "entry level". Well, unless you have a strong ability to sell stuff you cannot afford. Selling is not my strong point and obviously if I was to be paid commission to sell some trinket..... I am not making enough to pay for the gas in my car, or have a car.
With the years of attempting to find a job that allows me to be the "super mom" that apparently my family sees me as (because they leave everything to me to handle; the cooking, cleaning, the errand running, fixing stuff, and in some cases lawn care which includes shoveling snow.... basically, I do it all), I either happen to be "overqualified" or painfully "under qualified". I have a trade school degree in Cosmetology (aka a hairdresser) and no college degree. Before the economic crash in 2008, I was able to get work in an office, a bank, or a store. In fact, I was a customer service representative at a time, as well as a bank teller and a purchasing assistant for a manufacturer. In fact, I even did a stint as a secretary for a collection agency, so I can tell you that I have a well-rounded knowledge of various things, but sadly, the school of hard knocks is not an accredited college or university and my work history no longer applies as something viable in the job market. I did, though, find a place I could work AND give me all that I need, but alas, getting a job in the local high school (or any school) district is more difficult than getting a government job and getting a government job is downright impossible. I have been on the "clerical substitute list" for the past 3 years and with the random calls in to help..... there has been no offers of a job. Even when I apply outright, of which I put in 4 years of attempts. Full time, part time.... is does not matter. I just want an opportunity to get my foot in solidly in this world and I am passed over more times than I care to count. I have cried so many times being denied stable work that I have no more tears to shed. I wish I did, but I don't.
Well, that is when our healthcare insurance changed. From having really good coverage to basically none, I now self-diagnose and try to treat with over the counter drugs. Sure, there is this law that requires everyone to have healthcare coverage, but the cost is insane and what is affordable is like not having any coverage at all. Well, except the monthly bill to pay for the plastic card that states on the back of it that...."This card does not guarantee coverage. If you have questions regarding eligibility, call..." Yep, I have what is considered the worst healthcare coverage I have ever had in my life. With the rising costs of medications, the less coverage of doctor visits and the miles of red tape and flaming hoops to jump through of what is considered covered and what is not..... I spend more time on the phone with the insurance company trying to figure out if it is worth seeing a doctor at all. In all honesty.... with the increased premiums and the lowered actual covered services.... I am taking serious risks to my health. Even DH (my darling husband or any other "d" word that applies to describe my husband) is opting to not take important and life saving tests because when a test has the potential to become a "procedure", the money we shell out becomes more than what we actually have and we just do not have the money to pay for it and keep the basic necessities for not just ourselves, but our family. Really, it has boiled down to eating or seeing the doctor and I would like to be be able to eat. Of course, we eat poorly because the only cheaply attainable foods are processed garbage, we are already hurting ourselves regardless. Talk about controlling the population, right? Just kill off those less fortunate, but apparently too fortunate to be considered completely destitute.... aka "the middle class".
With this in mind, I have had the plethora of misfortune crash down on me and my family. Just last week, after months of poor sleeping patterns due to stress and no chiropractic coverage, I go seriously sick very quickly. Congestion so bad, I could not swallow, unless I wanted to choke, hit me like a ton of bricks. A fever of 101 had me shaking from head to toe. Aches and pains everywhere and no money to see the doctor and the inability to say no to any kind of work. Of course, having a severe cold was just the beginning because (here is a TMI moment).... infected hemorrhoids made it hard to sit, lay down, or even move (of which decided to burst during my fever), my menstrual cycle started a day later AND I managed to break a tooth to the point I was required to get a crown. Hmmm..... spending over $1500 that we do not have is not helping matters, but it happened. Then, of course, I got my annual pap smear results and those came back "abnormal", but apparently "non cancerous" and I have the option to go back in 6 months to get rechecked which will set me back roughly $200 or resume back to my annual, fully covered visit, but who knows..... it might become serious and I would not know until next year when it has a chance to become something deadly. THANKS OBAMACARE! I have enough smoke blown up my backside to where I might be doomed to an early death because my new healthcare coverage is too expensive to be thorough enough to keep me healthy. Oh, and THANKS TO THE ECONOMIC CRASH WITH NO END IN SIGHT because we cannot get above water financially to afford better care. Oh, and lets not forget to THANK THE CRAPPY JOB MARKET that I cannot get a job that I can qualify for that offers stable pay to even help my family get close to being slightly above water. I cannot afford to get a sparkly new college degree to attempt to get a job I can qualify for since it is a requirement that you need to have BOTH a degree AND on the job experience, regardless that training is basically mandatory for any job due to varying procedures and protocol.
While it is easy to blame the CEO's of major corporations, Administrators of schools, and such for the difficulty of letting a hard-working person with a strong work ethic have a chance of getting work, we have to also consider the governmental control over spending to exist through taxes that push decent jobs overseas and to other countries. For without all of you "puppet masters" and your desire to have it all and the lobbyists that fight for your "causes" to keep you rolling in money...... Things may have been too good here in the grand old U S of A. Glad to see the commercial ads of helping third world countries when your own country is just about as piss poor.
Trust me when I had said I have no more tears left in me because when I cried over the acknowledgement that I was going to cost over $1500 in bills somewhere (either doctor or dentist, of which the dentist won out), I cried the very last that I had that day. I have taken time to pray to God for help and I am ashamed of myself for the begging that I am doing. This grand plan of fate has destroyed me and I am waiting for the next shoe to drop. Will it be cancer? or will it be a bullet between the eyes? All I know is that I really do not want to be a burden to my family and my friends anymore.
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