Good morning! Just some random incomplete thoughts happening here.....
Question: Does a nerve eventually die if it is pinched long enough?
Just curious since my numb thumb issue from a pinched nerve is still going on and I have had that nerve pinched for nearly a month, now. It is either I am getting used to that tingly, fallen asleep feeling or I just really do not care anymore and happen to be willing to wait for it to finally stop on it's own, but it does make me wonder when the day comes and it is no longer feeling that tingly-numb feeling if I will actually have what is considered normal touch sensation ever again.
Current feeling: My shut up filter is on the fritz! I almost told off DH last week about his attitude. I probably should, but I really hate opening that can of worms because it would definitely make me appear like that "elephant never forgets" type of woman that uses past faults as examples and a reason to be bitchy. What is in the past should remain in the past.... you know.... water under the bridge and stuff like that? Heck, I blog to just let the toxic crap go and move on, right?
Descriptive issue in my job: A client (well, lets just say potential client) asked me how the current trend of The Ombre' look came about. Now, if I was a smart woman, I would have just left it as saying it is a dimensional color trend, but nooooooo..... I had to tell this person what I really thought and it was not all that trendy, to say the least. I basically said that it was becoming popular because the economy stinks and the look originated from a high maintenance woman being cut off from her hair salon allowance. Yep, you heard it here.... I called a trend look a result of not maintaining a color service. NOW there is Ombre' in a box for those that don't want a professional to create the look. I can't wait to see how many people will have to get a color correction from that disaster-in-a-box! Heck, I am still trying to grasp the concept that pastel colors are not all that new, but just a revisit to the "old lady colors" from back in the day. Really.... has nobody figured out that term "blue haired old lady" came from? Blue, pink and lavender were all the rage for senior citizens and now are the trend for younger generations. Talk about a generation shock!!
The DD/DH dilemma: Learned that I can no longer reason with my child about anything!! She wants to become a vegetarian and I really have no issues with it.... as long as she does the buying and preparing of her own food. Being a short-order cook is not in my blood and I am just not motivated to spend more time in the kitchen than necessary. I just can't get DH to change his ways even slightly to improve his health and now I have a child that wants to flip to a side we cannot afford. She has been an impressionable child, but her concerns, albeit reasonable, are irrational for arguments sake. While she has tried to be a vegetarian with what we have in food choices we purchase every week, I happen to see a lazy bag of bones and it concerns me. She does not take vitamins and she lacks getting protein. A total raging red flag in my eyes. I am still at least trying to get her to at least consume some meat here. I have at least won the one battle with DH to eat more lean meats and less processed and red meats. The only "vegetarian" meal he will eat is spaghetti with marinara sauce. I cannot get the veggie crumbles like I used to that made it look like we had ground beef in the sauce because he is the hawk that looks at everything we buy at the grocery store and is very vocal about anything considered different in his eyes. I think it is time I get help in the great meat debate, but who can I turn to that can think two steps ahead of DD and reach her in a reasonable manner? I think my big brother is going to be getting a call real soon! That smart-arse is my last hope!
More of the DD/DH dilemma: I live in a zoo or the paraplegic ward! Nobody.... and I mean nobody is trying to be helpful around here! Garbage stays on tables or wherever it lands, clothes no longer go where they belong, food gets left out, the shoe obstacle course is set, and oh.... just to top it all off..... the ability to make ice cubes is apparently too advanced in the home economics department. Yep, I am dealing with a pair of the laziest people alive to date! I tried to see if DH would step up a little and wash a dish or make some ice... maybe even see DD put the salad dressing, butter, or peanut butter away. Apparently, they are completely blind when it comes to filth! Dishes are not making it to the sink, the garbage can is overflowing (that is, the garbage that they do manage to get in there), seeds/nuts landing on the floor, food is left out to rot, and DH is unable to rinse out the coffee pot he used. Nobody drinks coffee here but him, so it is not my mess to deal with, but apparently it is my responsibility to clean it. The coffee spills on the counter cannot even be wiped up! What is that all about????? My protest mode when it comes to cleaning has hit its limit and I have more added on. I think I am losing my mind!!!
Why bite the head off the messenger?: My neighbor called yesterday with a deal for an automatic shut off valve to the sewer line (a vital thing in my neighborhood). While we have a manual shut off valve at our home, it is up to the diligence of DH or myself (more me than him) to go out in the rain and shut the valve to avoid flooding every time it rains. With his lazy tendencies, I have braved the serious storms brewing outside to close the valve in order to avoid flooding. Been doing this for years. DH bought this nightmare... not me. Well, I was told to mention to DH this deal that is getting just about everyone on my block to get an automatic shut off valve. I know he wants one and this deal is basically too good to pass up, but I got my head bit off because there is no money to get one. Who cares that we got a refund from our taxes and it is just sitting there in our account? DH knows it is there, but never entered the deposit of our tax refund. It is enough to get one of these "piece of mind" devises, but he is acting like we never got the refund. Heck, I know it is his way of trying to get ahead financially, but this is an actual necessity and not a luxury. Well, it is a luxury to me if I do not have to go outside to shut the darn valve. Maybe that is why he refuses to get one. He can get this done, but refuses to even try! Really, when did $1750.00 become impossible to obtain? I see people getting a small loan to get this and he just flat out refuses to even look at the idea! I know we have enough from our tax refund to pay for this, but he is acting like the bottom is going to fall out any day. I wonder.... is his being adamant a way to punish me even more? Heck, what did I do to deserve this? I may love him, but I am not liking him very much these days. Maybe I should stop being the one to close that darn valve in the storms and let him do the cleanup. Chances are.... he would just let our house rot from the inside out just to spite me. Definitely feeling like I am serving a karma-kick-in-the-backside prison sentence for something I did not do.
The being nice smack down: I am a nice person. I know that I will go out of my way for my friends, my family and even my job. I just never realized, that is until recently, that my being nice is turning me into a welcome mat. My family refuses to show appreciation for what I do, and my co-workers have managed to hand me jewelry to fix, but not one measly card for my birthday (well, DD made a card for me and DH went with the tried and true thoughtless gift of candy). Heck! Only one co-worker wished me a happy birthday on Facebook and the customary birthday cake for employee's birthdays have passed me up for 5 years running, but yet again, Nancy goes out of her way when the need arises. I really do not want to be the bitch at work, but I feel it is about time that I become one and start demanding my fair share! Instead of some kind of happy birthday at work, I get a potential overflow client dangled in front of me to be taken away and a zip-lock bag with broken cheap-arsed jewelry to fix "in my spare time". Oh., and to pick up the slack when the shop princess cannot clean up after herself. Yep, I had a dismal day at work in more ways than one. I thought I was losing clients, but to later find out that people forget that I could come in on my days off for my clients and give them to others at the salon. Never really asking if I can come in unless it is yet another pedicure that I have stated I can no longer do because of back issues. I guess I speak in a foreign language because when I say "NO", they never hear me, but when I say "I CAN", they believe I can't. Really, what is that all about?
Beyond the usual frustrations, I guess I am doing as well as I can. Getting stepped on, forgotten about and verbally chewed out is getting quite tolerable nowadays. I do believe that what is being tossed my way is supposed to make me stronger, but when will fate change its path and give me a break.... I have no clue. Maybe all this toxic crap is supposed to destroy me, but I am too stubborn to let it happen. God knows I have been trying to change the course set before me, but all I do is fail. Maybe it is time to let the chips fall where they may and totally gut me into a shell of a human being. Sure has been feeling like I am getting more and more hollow. I can only assume I deserved this, but I really hoped it would be different.
Oh well....... (((((FLUSH)))).... Moving forward from here. Thanks for tolerating my flush of thoughts. It was not a floss.... just a drop and flush. Have a good day!
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