Today, I decided to take it easy and try to get all my errands done early, but alas, an early afternoon call resulted in me making yet another errand run for supplies. (sigh) So, after DD goes out to hang with friends for a while, I decided to motivate myself to get back in my truck and run to one of the local beauty supply places I go to for supplies for a client (aka my early afternoon call). Since I was already out of the house, I figured I would stop at the local 7-11 and get something to drink.
The local 7-11 convenience store is filled with teenage kids loading up on frozen treats on this nice, summer day. Well, only one teenager was there with a mission at hand to achieve and that mission was witnessed by me and it got me thinking.......
Poor kid, probably not a day over 16, is purchasing a box of condoms and the look on his face was priceless! It was a cross between embarrassment and boastful pride.... apparently this little youngster had some serious plans for later (if you catch my drift). While I am relieved that this is a sign of a responsible member of the horizontal activities club, I am also reminded that the teenage years are the most difficult. It is all that love in the air being tossed about with zero clue what love really means and the differing expectations of people. In the mindset of a girl (well, hello! I happen to be a girl, so I am aware of this part of the thought process...), the act of sex (yep, I said sex) is seen as a serious commitment between two people in love. While at that young age, what they believe is true love is nothing more than hormonal lust and desire. It sadly takes roughly until they are in their 30's to figure that out. Hmmm.... I think I recall telling DD she couldn't date until she is in her 30's.... I think I need to remind her again why I would prefer to have her not date until she is at least 30 years old. (food for thought) Now, in the thought process of a boy (remember, I am only assuming here... and these thoughts appear to be accurate), boys have a far lower thought process of what love truly is and having sex (yep, I said it again) is some kind of rite of passage into being one of the cool guys out there (aka a player, or you can add a little slang to it and call him a play-ya). Sadly... heck, even more sadly... most boys lack acknowledging true love until they are darn near 40 (and that is a very small window because I believe DH hit his midlife crisis or change of life just before he hit 50). While I know that not all men go from adolescent to adult and then back to adolescent in the same time frame, but I have yet been able to meet a man that has the ability to truly know what the difference between love and sex is. In simpler terms.... Women see sex as making love and men don't. So, seeing this young man (I will call him that on the sole premise he is being responsible with buying the condoms), had me thinking.
In all honesty, I cannot give you a solid answer to how I really feel about seeing a teenage boy buy buying condoms at the local 7-11 in the late afternoon. Part of me is laughing at the idea that this kid thinks he is going to get "lucky", but another part of me feels concerned... the idea of doing something as serious as being intimate with someone is seen as an adult act and in my eyes... he is not old enough for something like that (at least mentally). Then, I became concerned for the person that was not with him in the store buying those things.... what about the other person? Are they sure that this is the right thing to be doing? Are they strong enough to carry the burden of being talked about behind their back? Girls won't kiss and tell, but boys are known for boasting and bragging to their friends. Maybe this boy is sincere, but maybe he is not. I have heard stories (and heck, have experienced it myself), of the ultimatum game (If you love me, you will have to prove it), or the play of emotions game (Let me show you how much I love you)... peer pressure at its finest.
Of course, I do have to acknowledge one other thing and it happens every day with every person on some level..... It is the desire to be desirable. Magazines peddle the scene and people eat it up with a spoon. Looking a certain way may make a person feel good about themselves, but it can send a very wrong message toward others. That level of expectation based upon how a person looks has me concerned. While a girl may feel good running around in a bikini, I guarantee that there are boys getting an eye full of lusty thoughts and some of the bikinis I saw this summer had less coverage than the underwear I have on. Obviously, I put my foot down when it came to DD's swimwear selection (she has a one-piece), and I am the judge of what she wears outside my home. I am not afraid to tell her my reasons why I am this way. She might argue with me, but when she gets older.... she will understand and then thank me... I hope.
It is a scary world we live in. That is all I can say about it. What I recall as innocence of youth is tainted in many shades of grey and I am cynical enough to see them all, sarcastic enough to laugh over the discomfort that kid suffered buying condoms, and scared enough to seriously consider to chain myself to DD in order to protect her from what I am calling "the hormonal years". Fortunately, I am open enough to talk to DD about these things and to remind her that love, only the truest and purest form of love, is not measured in putting out. It is measured in patience and respect. Oh, and I told her that regardless of the "rain gear" he wears... he better have a wedding ring for her, a steady job, and a firm understanding of what a commitment means because condoms are not 100%... only abstinence is. If he believes she is worth it... then he can wait until marriage. If not.... then he is not worthy.
Thanks for reading! Have a great day!!
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