Just a few thoughts here. You know.... just thinking out loud, but why is society so focused on differences demanding equality when it is the constant reminders of those differences that create the problem. Don't get me wrong, but why is the focus on the differences more important than the bigger picture? With political correctness going so far as to coddling the bruised egos of others, where is the focus on the fact that every person, regardless of race, creed, religion, mental/emotional state, physical appearance, sexual orientation, and whatnot is a person first and their label is second? A black person is still a person, right? A gay person is still a person, right? A person that believes in a different religion is still a person, right? Then why all the chaos and upheaval? We all have a core equality... we are people. The labels to which we choose to highlight is what is causing the great divide and those labels are the problem. Learning to be biased because of a label is wrong, but it is a tradition passed down from generation to generation. It is truly up to those that have influence in their own lives as well as others (like a family situation), to change the tradition and the course of which is taken. Yes, our labels make us different, but forcing these labels into the limelight only brings on the ugly base instincts of jealousy, prejudice, bigotry, and shame. Heck, even in some cases.... violence. In order to stop it, we need to shine the light away from those labels and focus on our common thread.... we are people.
Whew! With that out of the way, I have another pondering thought process and that is due to the medical profession, the insurance industry, and the economy. Oh, and maybe the coddling through political correctness and fear of hurting feelings.
When I was a kid, if I got out of hand, I would get a slap from my mom. It could be her hand, a shoe, a wooden spoon or a belt, but that slap got my attention that I was misbehaving and I needed to pay attention to yet another life lesson. Sure, I have no doubt that there were people that got out of hand when it came to punishing children for bad behavior. Yes, there is a fine line between a punishment and abuse, but with today's parent being told that putting your child in a corner will suffice as a reasonable punishment, I fear that we just created a generation of people that truly have no learning curve to retain proper decorum. Really, having a kid sit in a corner for a minute matching age in years is basically giving a child time to think now about what they did was wrong, but figure a way to not get caught next time. I have watched children these days have a foul mouth and a snippy attitude towards their parents in public and watch the parents take it in stride. Temper tantrums getting what they want so they would stop making a scene and zero follow through in teaching a life lesson that is important to retain. Seems like we, as a society, is becoming a mental state. Mental as in medicating less than zen like behavior and medically inducing what happiness is supposed to be like. More and more children are being diagnosed with ADD, ADHD, Depression, and whatnot with cookie cutter guidelines easily found on Google and the internet. A child that thinks outside the box has ADD, a child with boundless energy has ADHD, an angst ridden preteen and teenager is automatically depressed or bipolar. All these conditions are getting medicated. It seems to be all the rage to shove a pill down your child's throat instead of teach our children the essential coping skills. Of course, when it comes to teenagers.... they really have no interest in sharing anything with their parents in order to get these words of wisdom to help them. No, we get doctors digging in the shallow end of the diagnosis pool and pushing parents to send your child to a psychologist with a prescription in hand. Not exactly teaching our youth the proper skills to take on challenges, but to lead them into a life filled with pills that have potentially dangerous side effects. More dangerous than the diagnosis symptoms. The push for perfection without the padding of reminding your child that as long as they did their best, that is good enough. Sadly, regardless of the number of times we remind our children just that.... they still push themselves harder than necessary, thus becoming the cookie cutter crumb of diagnosis that will result in popping more pills. Really, is it living a drug free life if you are chained to your prescription bottle?
Of course, lets not forget the coddling of the parents to let their child refuse to learn rational thought or seek actual help because there are parents these days that will condone bad behavior in the first place. That coddling of emotions that are desirable and ignoring the less than joyful ones is a recipe for disaster. Forcing our hand at being involved more than being the cook and the chauffeur to the extra curricular activities with a side of being the maid and your child's personal piggy bank is necessary. Life skills need to be taught and it is not fully being covered in the classroom. Sadly, the current economy and the cost of living makes it mandatory to have both parents unavailable for much more than the very basics and relying on the school system to fill the blanks. Electronic babysitters are on the rise and our youth lack social graces, but they are being used more and more. The music scene has its pitfalls when children try to emulate their favorite artist with either a lack of clothes or jeans sagging down to their knees. Their demand for attention is attracting bad attention, but as they see it.... attention is attention. There is a disconnection with our youth and we are allowing it because we just cannot find the time or energy to do much about it. Money is the driving force and it takes effort to earn it. Sadly, there are some that put innocent people at risk by taking it instead. There seems to be less and less middle ground these days. It is one or the other. You can be more involved in your child's life, but lack the funds to support most of everything, or you can be less involved and hope for the best. The less in either scenario is damaging. But hey! There are now medications to fix the problem, right? Sigh, it is just so sad. I guess the reason for this rant is that DD's doctor has yet again labeled her "depressed" and is now pushing for her to be medicated. Not all that thrilled with that assessment since there are medications that have potential dangers and side effects that make me second guess if she should go the medicinal route, but the constant reminder that DD's mental health questionnaire shows her as depressed and in need of help is pushing me to just make everyone chemically happy and let them medicate her. I just need assurances that she does not become chemically dependent. Life is not meant to be lived in a fog, but I just don't know what else I can do anymore. She does counseling during the school year (it is what we can actually afford right now), but she says that counseling in a group is not benefiting her like it should. I try talking to her, but she has no interest in me helping her. I guess the time has come to try to find more money from the lack of that we have to at least get her to see a professional outside of the school system for some one on one. I just hope it works.
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