Looking in the mirror today reminded me that reality is cruel, or my eyesight is really bad. Stupid me had a moment when I actually felt "pretty"... well, that is, until I looked in a full length mirror. I realized that there are people that offer you compliments willingly even when you are not looking for them, but appreciate them nonetheless. Over the past week or so, I have gotten random compliments. I was not all that sure why people were offering them so willingly, but it was a nice thing to hear. I just find it so interesting that after getting a compliment here and there, you start to wonder if the comments are honest ones.
At work last weekend, someone told me that I have gorgeous eyes. A few days before that, I was told that I look young for my age when I got "carded". Just yesterday, someone told me that I have a great personality. All of these compliments were well appreciated, but became that curious under note to see for myself. Now, as you can see, the compliments are from the chin and upwards. I should have not looked farther than the bathroom mirror on the medicine cabinet, but there was one compliment that I felt even more compelled to look at myself in a full-length mirror.... someone told me that they noticed that I was losing weight. Knowing that my weight issue has become an all-consuming monster of its own, I wanted to see if my 10 pound loss really made a noticeable difference. After looking in a full length mirror, I felt I was lied to because I could not see it.
Just a little note to self that is worthwhile to share: A 10 pound weight loss really is not all that noticeable. For those skinny chicks that I am friends with that bitch and moan about needing to lose 5 pounds need a slap up the backside of their head. Really... who is gonna notice that measly number? I lost 10 pounds and I could not see a difference.... so there!
I don't know.... It made me wonder if compliments are really genuine thoughts of another person. I recall seeing a pair of friends 'bump' into each other at the grocery store. One just had a baby. Now, not to sound all bitter, but newborns look all the same to me.... They are all cute. Well, that is until you come across one that isn't (which I haven't). Compliments were offered and they went their separate ways. Is it at all possible that a person will offer a compliment because they would rather be nice than honest? I see that being a distinct possibility. Think about it.... you see a very heavy set girl and you can hear the comments from a distance of... "but she has such a pretty face". It almost sounds like a code phrase of she's fat. Ever been set up on a blind date? We know that people will say that this mystery person you are about to go to dinner with has a witty sense of humor or great personality which means he/she is not exactly 'eye candy'. It is those niceties that offer confidence when a person lacks it. I guess why I am thinking that these compliments are less than honest is because I seem to lack the ability to see what they see.
Maybe I am a little hard on myself... maybe I am really hard on myself... I do not know. I am trying to be gracious in accepting compliments at face value, but the toughest critic will always be me.
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