Hello folks! Just making a quick blog today. I have a lot to accomplish and not a lot of daytime hours to complete it.... Well, isn't that always the way things are, huh?
Well, lets just dive right in... shall we?
Question of the day to ponder upon: Have you ever felt that change is too scary because you dwell upon the odds that the changes are not necessarily in your favor? You know that there is benefit to change; the excitement that there is something new just over the horizon, the possibility that there is an improved quality to your life or how things happen. It can be a change in how a job is done, it can also be a personal change in your habits. We, as ordinary people with extraordinary potential, have a tendency to grasp upon what we know and are accustomed to. Repetitive actions are considered 'normal' and expected.
Think about it.... what we happen to do on a daily basis becomes a habit. It can be as remedial as which leg we put our pants on first, to which way you stir your coffee. We rarely ever put much thought into how we do things... it just gets done. Now, face a challenge that makes you change what you have been doing for years. Kind-of difficult to actually grasp on a personal level, but is rather easier to face on a professional (aka work related) level. Well, that is, unless can you rewire your thought process. At work, you get a new procedure in writing to follow when it comes to changing something you have been doing for years. In life, you don't get the convenience of a written procedure to follow like you get at work. It is a mind-set that gets you there. It takes energy to remind yourself that what was as remedial as tying your shoes no longer applies when you are making changes. Sadly, there is a personality flaw that we all happen to have and it is called..... stubbornness.
Like having the old adage of, "it isn't broke, don't fix it". Deep. inside our DNA makeup, we have tendencies to dig our heels deep into the ground and refuse to budge. Well, that is something I am facing every day. I create a firm belief in things and refuse to show any course of reason. I guess that is what habits are. Something we tend to hold onto and become unwilling to let go. Even when change is necessary. I realized that my inadequacies (aka bad habits) have been reasoned with in a way that I have justified their need to exist. You see, DH had to quit smoking because he was "broken", so to speak and to "fix" the situation, he had to make changes. Believe me, he was more than willing to make those changes. He was "scared straight" into making some serious lifestyle changes. He even quit drinking (well, at this point he might have had 4 beers in the past month and that is a major change compared to what he was drinking on a daily basis). As for me... well, I know that I need to quit smoking. I know that there are some major health benefits if I do quit. Is the desire there? Yes. Is my determination there? Not really. My stubborn side has a strong hold. It even offered a level of reasoning that makes me unsure if I get to achieve my first goal in getting thinner. Stupid stubbornness using reasoning that can be accepted as fact. My history of quitting smoking proved that. But going back to that bad habit did not get me thinner, either.
I have been on that medication for a week, as of today. Knowing that I could smoke while taking this created an increase in smoking. The desire to keep lighting up is still there and my quit date is quickly approaching. You see, I am quitting on my anniversary as a gift of support to DH and to my family for a better life. I just hope that after that last puff is done, I can lose that excessive weight and start my days off free from a stubborn habit. I can only hope that my stubborn side can change just enough to make the necessary changes. No written procedure to remind me.....
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