I was a thin gal once.
It took me until my teenage years to get there, but I was thin once. What I found interesting back then was all I
had to do was move more than most to get there.
You see, back then, I was able to eat candy and ride my bicycle for
miles and managed to lose weight. I
guess it was the “move more” movement that worked for me, but once I got my
drivers license, I resorted to eating less… way less to stay thin through the
rest of my teenage years. Little did I
know that I would go down a very long spiral into becoming a stress eater with
high expectations that being on a diet for a week would be the answer I need to
get thin again. Adulthood really let me
down when I worked in an office and sat most of the day. When I worked in the salon, I was on my feet. There has never been a balance to consider as
my age went up with my waistline. The moment
I fully landed in obesity city is when I was pregnant with my daughter. Probably didn’t help that I waited until I hit
my 30’s to become a mother, but having my daughter was worth it. I sadly was complacent in overweight-ville
for far too long and lost focus.
Believe me, I tried dieting to lose the weight, but there
were so many roadblocks that set me up for failure. I tried Jenny Craig and managed to lose a few
pounds, but could not see myself eating Jenny Craig approved TV dinners for the
rest of my life. I had heard of some
people succeeding, but would land back in obese city once they were left to
their own devises to maintain that goal weight.
Sure, there were some that probably won the battle and stayed a winner,
but I have no doubt that there were just as many that fell off the goal weight
pedestal they worked at getting to. I
had tried Weight Watchers…. Twice! I did
well my first round with losing 45 pounds, but hit the brick wall of a plateau
that had me quit. I figured that once
the scale budged more than a tenth of a pound, I would jump back on the food
Nazi bandwagon and get to my goal. It
was nice to have anything I wanted to eat and maintain my weight, but lost
focus and my weight skyrocketed before I could stop it. I went back to Weight Watchers to try again,
but their program changed in a way that I couldn’t meet that important weight loss
goal of 10% of my body weight. It was
like my body decided that losing weight was a bad thing and held tightly to
every fat cell that resided inside me.
It was a plateau situation all over again! Only, I managed to lose 15 pounds and not the
45 I once lost before.
With even more weight to lose compared to the first time on
Weight Watchers, I decided that after a year of no changes on the scale, I
decided to go on the journey alone. At
least my wallet got a break. That
monthly fee to sit in meetings and be told it is bad to eat like normal people
when it came to celebrations and eating out with friends. That constant nagging need to figure if I
could spare the points for my day to have a piece of cake at the birthday party
or a few chips with salsa for a snack.
Heck, trying to figure out how many points it is for the salad dressing
at the restaurant was giving me a migraine.
I understand that things should hold a value, but every bleeping crumb
that passed my lips was getting to be a bit tiresome. Then, let’s not forget the activity points
you can earn. Gee, was shoveling the
driveway of snow for an hour a high intensity exercise with more points I can
eat? Or was my shoveling of the snow for
an hour a low intensity activity because I didn’t throw out my back? I was truly starting to believe that I lacked
the ability to decide for myself anymore, but I at least figured that if I ate
less carbs and ate more lean meats with vegetables and fruit, something will
happen.
For the next couple years, I thought I had my eating all
figured out, but then the evil beast all women call Menopause came knocking on
my door. The hot flashes, the mood
swings, the night sweats and the itchy skin came to play and they brought the
most unwelcome friend to the party…. Weight gain. That beast thwarted every attempt I made to
lose weight. Sure, I had a moment that
proved promising and that was drowning myself in drinking only water. Sadly, I was not aware that too much of a
good thing can potentially kill you when your sodium levels drop and you almost
pass out doing ordinary tasks around the house, but I did lose 10 pounds. With a little tweaking, I got myself back to
feeling normal again, but it took me gaining those 10 pounds I lost.
I had accepted my fate and my body decided that I am meant
to be obese. That is when something
changed inside me. I started losing
weight! Albeit, it was not much. A pound or two here and there, but there was
progress. I recall going to the doctor
and was told to step on that blasted scale, only to find that I was down 4
pounds! It is not anything monumental in
the eyes of my doctor, but it was a welcome surprise to me! I started thinking long and hard as to how
this happened and came to the conclusion that my daily taking of a multivitamin
was the step in the right direction.
Sure, I took vitamins while on all those diets and restrictive eating
plans I tried over the years, but this just seemed…. Different. It was not some disgusting horse-pill sized
daily vitamin that got stuck in my throat every day. It was a chew-able gummy vitamin that tasted
like candy to me. Made taking vitamins
so much easier and I actually look forward to taking them. I also added a probiotic gummy that has
prebiotics for digestive health. It was
like getting candy for an after breakfast treat! With taking vitamins daily now, I noticed
that I am not painfully sick in the fall and winter like I have been, and it
has become easier to eat in moderation.
Of course, eating in moderation has been something I always worked on,
but there have been times I would take a second helping without thinking much
of it.
Another thing I noticed is that
my family life has changed. I became a
grandma almost a year ago and with the additional mouth to feed and the budget
to maintain, I went into what I call the martyr mode of eating. I made sure that everyone had enough to eat
before I even think of having seconds of anything (and that included
vegetables), and I always make my portions small to start. Noticing that being satiated was enough and
getting stuffed only made me want to throw up.
Along with the change in eating, I was moving more because I had more cleaning
set before me. I have noticed that I am
okay with snacking here and there, but even that has improved. I am not denying myself anything and it is so
freeing from all those years of counting calories, points, and whatnot while
forcing a diet on myself.
Sure, there are times I do not see those big changes on the
scale, but every pound matters. The last
time I stepped on the scale for my official total, I was down a total of 41
pounds! Of course, there are times the number
on the scale goes the wrong way, or no way at all, but I remind myself that
getting upset only pushes me to give up hope.
I am losing this weight for myself and nobody else. I have a goal weight in mind and I remind
myself that it will take time. That
there are obstacles everywhere, but if I appreciate the progress and not beat
myself on the setbacks, I believe that there is hope that I can get there. Not in the time-frame that I would like to
have, but in the time-frame that my body allows it… it will happen. It boils down to having a little self-love
and a whole lot of patience.
Just recently, a client that has not seen me in months came
in to get her hair done. As I walked up
to greet her, she gave me the compliment that I needed to hear… “WOW! You lost
weight! I almost didn’t recognize you!!” Just knowing that people can see the change
means a lot to me. It validates the
progress that I have made and is peeling away the pounds that were hiding the
person inside. The person I am proud of. As long as I remain positive in my efforts and strive to keep trying.... I will get there.
So, in conclusion.... Does a healthy mind make a healthy body? I think it does.
Thanks for reading and have a great day!
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