I have not been in the best frame of mind. A recent strong storm has knocked out the power in my neighborhood and is not expected to be back on until the weekend. DH and I have been arguing via messages to each other because we know that if we actually tried to talk, it would become really ugly. Writing back and forth offers us a little time to think things through before throwing blows to each other and keeps the sight of an argument away from DD. We have a generator running at all times so we can save our food, keep the sump pump running, have use of the TV, use of the computer, some lights and a fan or two. All food is being cooked on the grill since all our appliances run on electricity and the generator can only do so much. We have no AC because of the situation and the temps are to be in the 80's with relative humidity all week which is creating some real tense people in this "hot box" we call home. There is no breeze to cool us off or even cool off the house. Laundry is piling up because we are sweating through everything we manage to put on. Tethered to the house because of the generator, only short trips to the gas station for more gas for the generator are being made.
The heat is making me sick. Massive headache from hearing the generator run constantly. My patience is nil. DH is avoiding talking to me, DD has got a mouth on her that would have resulted in missing teeth back in my day, and I already know that somehow this scenario will be twisted in such a way that it will be all my fault. At night, I have hear generators on my block, but travel one block in either direction and they seem to have power because I can hear their AC units running. Somehow, ComEd, the only electricity provider where I live, cannot seem to find where the outage is. While I do not claim to be a rocket scientist, but it is quite obvious. Now, I know that I am not the only one without power from this storm. There are roughly 400,000 others in my situation across the northern part of Illinois suffering like I am, but I find it comical that they manage to get so close and be yet so far away when the power can be restored a block away in one day, but it will take almost a week to get my block back online.
I have managed to take on way too much lately and I have stressed myself into a wreck. I have missed out on events that I should have gone to or should be going to. I am feeling really out of touch with people because of it. When I do share, I hear "crickets" like I just shared mt soul in an empty forest with nobody around. I guess I must have really pissed someone off to get to feel so cut off these days.
I have decided that I am going to take a break from it all and not blog for a while. In fact, I am not going to be visiting my Facebook account for a while. I just can't seem to be in a witty frame of mind for my friends there. I do not want to burn any more bridges than I might have, if I have. I think by tomorrow, I will have sent all the early birthday wishes for my friends for the rest of the month, I will clear my wall and clear my mind. I was never the popular one anyway, so I won't be missed. I just figured that it would be a considerate thing to do to at least share that I am signing off for a while to those that seem interested.
As I said... I am in a bad frame of mind and I need to do something about it.
Thanks for reading.
Take care.
Be safe.
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