Signs....

Like the song, "Signs", by Five Man Electric Band, the word sign informs you of what is expected or offers a warning.  Quite frustrating when there are so many that expect so much, but today's blog is about another kind of sign that can create the same level of frustration or anger.  Today's sign is about the revelation that tells you, "it's pretty darn awful when..." and you know you have no other choice but to do something about it.

How about when it is something painfully obvious that you are dealing with?  What started off as simply allergies that quickly turned into something far worse that requires a doctor's attention.  All the signs were there...  Congestion, sneezing, coughing, painfully swollen sinuses, loss of taste/smell, and body aches.  Those simple things we take for granted are no longer working right, and you know you need help.  While I know that when I am not feeling well, I have the tendency to being really mean.  In fact, I believe I was told that I turn into a bitch when I am not feeling right.  DH happens to remind me often of that.  When I was pregnant with DD, it was DH's first dose of the nasty creature I am capable of becoming.  Morning sickness was something I did not like.  While I try to soften the blow of being miserable with being sarcastic in the way that the comedian, Bill Engval, has of his coined phrase.... "well, here's your sign" after giving an off the wall explanation to something that people could easily figure out the obvious.

In fact, I do recall having a Bill Engval moment in the doctor's office yesterday.  While I know that it is just habit for doctors to ask you how you are when they walk into the room as their way of having a remotely decent bedside manner, it is just a huge opening for the bitch in me (because I am not feeling well, remember?) to come out.  When the good old doc asked that question to me yesterday upon her arrival to the room where I waited for her, I could not help myself and became the sarcastic bitch with....  "well, I feel just darn wonderful, doc!  I just wanted to waste some money I do not have to give you a visit.... what do you think? (here's your sign)"  Of course, she has known me for years and changed her questions from there on.  After a few pokes, prods, a cold stethoscope on my back, some heavy panting, some pointed questions about sinus discharge, a lighted scope shining in my ears and a look down my throat....  she stated the obvious conclusion that I had before I went in to see her....  I have a sinus infection.  Her added bonus is that I had a slight wheeze and that is a sign of bronchitis knocking on the door.  After a brief talk about what she in prescribing for me to take and how to take it, I was on my way.

Once I was home with all the medicines I am now required to take in order to get better, I had a new round of stupid questions waiting for me once my family returned home.  Obviously, I am not allowed to get sick.  DH ended up getting reminded to why I get sinus infections so easily when he asked what the doctor's prognosis was, DD was smart to keep her distance when she got home from school, but made the fatal mistake of being snarky when I asked her to clean up her mess from her homework assignment, DH with his lack of compassion for when I am not feeling well gave me a guilt trip when it was time to get the dishes washed and to take the garbage out, so I took care of it myself and I ended up sleeping poorly in the recliner for another night.

Why is it that people lack the memory of things being told to them to why things happen?  I have been with DH for almost 16 years and 14 of them are married, and he still forgets why I am so prone to sinus infections.  Really, how many times do I need to remind him that I was told that an old injury to my nose (I broke it, but only so slightly that my nose looks straight from a softball accident in High School) is the culprit and that the solution is to have surgery to straighten it out so there is no chance for irritants to get trapped and become infected every time, such a hard thing to remember?  I am not a fan of elective surgery and it is not a constant issue with me, but a painful one when it happens.  The way I see it is that I have character that is hidden pretty well.  If it was more obvious, I would have decided to do something about it, but I really am not all that vain to worry about it.  Who knows....  is it possible that my inability to change things that cannot be seen is the reason that they lack the compassion to where my feelings are concerned?  Maybe my lack of attention to my own little details is the sign that others should not care, either?  If it is.... where can I add more to that sign that I would appreciate a little compassion from time to time for others to see?  Heck, I care more about them than I do for myself, but I so hope that someday they could care about me just a little more from time to time.  Maybe my caring too much for them leaves them no room or desire to care for others since I do it all for them anyway.  UGH!  Darn medicines!  Makes me dopey!  Maybe I can try to get my glasses back on and do some reading today.  I hate taking more than a couple of days to read a book and this book that should have taken me only two days to read is only half done and I have had it for four days already.  Darn sign that my being sick makes it hard to wear my glasses or even see straight.  The only up side is that food is tasteless.  I just might lose a few more pounds from the lack of desire to eat tasteless stuff.  Time to get the PineSol out and do some heavy duty cleaning anyway.  Once I can smell again, I will know I did a good job cleaning.  Yep, my best defense to being sick is to deal and move forward.  Complaining gets me nowhere.

Thanks for reading and have a great day!  As for me, the housewife, caregiver and maid....  I am not allowed sick time and is required to keep working.  The only way out of this is to call in dead and that is not likely since I woke up on the top side of the sod.  I'll never catch a break.....