I had a dream.... A strange dream.... I wrote a book and this was the title. This book would have the stories of what women think as a guide for men to realize that their actions are rarely ever understood the way they intended. It has always been known that there are is a level of truth found from one of the many facets of what people believe.... There is his side, her side, and somewhere in the middle is the truth. Sadly, what someone sees as fact is skewed from the individual perception of the situation. Just the concept is something that had me wake up in a cold sweat..... There is no way that I could muster the courage to write a conceptual work of literary art.
I see writing as an art form. Just as a person can look at a painting or a sculpture, it is what a person gets from it.... a feeling formed. I do envy artists, ya know. They have no fear of judgement of their work. Critique is encouraged. People are free to feel whatever they choose to feel from their masterpiece and the artist is not bothered by being looked at under a critical eye that is different than their own.
I think what scares me into a cold sweat is how would I begin? Well, there is far more that could frighten me into a shaking, sweating lump of flesh.... There is, of course, holding the attention of a reader for longer than a few pages is important, right? Really, who would want to check out a book about a one-sided perceptual piece? Heck, I have no attention span for a self-help genre of a book..... No matter how educational it could be. When I go to the library, I steer clear of non-fictional works. I am not all that interested in reading about the famous that managed to write a biography. I see that people have a life and I really lack the ability to brag about it in book form. My life is not all that interesting to read. I know I blog about things, but in all honesty.... I am no different than the next person. I wake up every morning and complete the tasks that are placed before me to the best of my ability. I deal with drama like the rest of the world as level-headed as I possibly can, and I have feelings like the rest of the world about what happens around me. I just happen to have a knack to look a little deeper than most over what others see as trivial crap. I try to look at potential outcomes that could happen when I happen to do something... well, anything when it comes to interaction with people.
Here is one recent example of what I mean.....
Just last week, I am at home, doing my usual stuff (cooking and cleaning). I stopped to make myself a sandwich since it was lunch time. At that same moment, DH comes home for lunch. During the week, he comes home to reheat the previous night's leftovers for his lunch. He has a routine of pulling out the food, place it in the microwave, grab his glass, pop an ice cube or two in and open the fridge again to get his home-brewed iced tea. He shares what has happened at work that morning, and proceeds to woof down his heated lunch, swig down his tea, and announces that he going back to work. There is very little interaction of my day or even thought of what I am up to.... he is the focus of the moment. I really do not mind because there is really no interesting story to share over what I do when it comes to housework. I have, in the past, mentioned what I have accomplished, but that sure does not hold for much of an interesting conversation. Well, onward I shall go with this.... As DH opens the freezer for some ice, he loudly complains that there is no ice that is popped out of the ice tray and in the ice bin for easy access. He slams the freezer door and announces that he is so tired of always making the ice that he will drink his tea warm.
Here is my thought process over his mini tantrum..... Really, warm tea??? Apparently the fridge keeps his tea warm instead of cold... ugh! (smacking my hand on my forehead.... I never realized that a refrigerator keeps food warm! I am shocked!!) Since there is ice made in the tray, all that is needed to be done is to twist it to release the cubes and put it in the bin. Then add some water to the empty tray and place it back in the freezer.... hmmm... takes roughly a minute to do this.... what makes this such a daunting task? FINE! I will do it for you since it is such a difficult task to accomplish....
I walk over to the fridge and open the freezer door. I popped the ice cubes from the tray, dropped the cubes in the ice bin, refilled the tray with water, placed the trays (we have 2 of them) back in the freezer, grabbed an ice cube (well, actually 2) and plopped it into his glass of tea. I walked away without saying a word while my devious wheels are turning since his childish act has set me on edge. The whining over something that takes virtually no effort and very little time is just as abrasive as nails on a chalkboard. Then a smile comes across my face as I have an idea to avoid his perfect-pitch whining that makes me leap through flaming hoops to have him shut the hell up and be happy.... Apparently, the saying of "as long as she is happy.... I am happy", does not apply to my happiness.... I strive to make someone so proficient in being miserable into a happy person..... I never really see any effort from him and rarely ever a "thank you" for my efforts. I decided to focus on the problem. Like how a man usually thinks when his woman decides to vent her feelings.... men seek out solutions. They are the natural born fixers... well, most of them. Not in my world... I am the fixer, apparently. My solution? As vindictive as it was..... I was going to go to the store and buy the biggest bag of ready-made ice and stuff my freezer with it. In fact, the thought of stuffing it to the point of it falling out once a person opens the door was what I wanted to aim for. That should stop the whining for needing to lift a finger and actually be helpful for once. He can have ice until Christmas for all that I care!! My goodness!! Just hearing that tone of his whining and my last patient nerve being frayed into something on the verge of snapping is making me cruel in my thoughts. I am darn near cutting his meat at dinner because of his laziness!! I am no longer married to a man, but a child that happens to have a full time job that pays the bills. Well, I should look at him as the king of his domain and that the queen is just a peasant that fans his face while feeding him grapes (well when it comes to him, I would have to change the grapes into something like beer, cheese cubes or those little sausage pieces you can buy in a bag for $3 at Walgreens.... he refuses to eat fruit and avoids most vegetables, ya know). I can only guess that since I have gotten the short end of the equality in marriage stick, I have become a bitter person. If this is Karma kicking my backside.... I would like to know who I have wronged so I can make amends and get a break in life for once!!
Upon thinking about this.... you can see that I have very little material to share for something even being remotely close to what a book should have. Just a bunch of short stories that offer no lesson actually being learned.... just perceptual pieces that shed light on the estrogen induced populous and how the actions (or even non-actions) of the testosterone induced population create the chasm of bitterness, drama, and misunderstandings. You know.... understanding the feelings people get from expectations. I would never want to place the spotlight on one side of the gender group in a bad light. Not all men are terrible. Some of my best friends happen to be men. They give me a clearer perspective that make me more understanding to most of what and why men do what they do. I find it interesting that both men and women do have a vested interest in understanding each other, but will still have misunderstanding nonetheless. Of course, it all boils down to the individual expectations we all stake claim to and our demands to have those expectations met. Some people are more flexible and willing to compromise, while others stand rigid in what they want. Sadly, not every person is a perfect match and completely understood by another. If there was..... it would appear to be blissful, but painfully boring and predictable. That is where I just do not see the importance or entertainment value in the book I dreamed of writing. Even after writing this.... I realized that I lack the necessary humor to make it even enjoyable in my eyes.... I love a good laugh. Oh well, at least I thought about it. Just do not plan on seeing me have a published work out there that people would stand in line to purchase.....
Off to do my usual stuff.... cooking, cleaning and stuff like that..... Have a great day everyone!!!
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