OUCH! Good morning! I have a couple of things to share and then I will be off to face the day with a much slower moving body that will be wincing and making noises that only come from someone far older than my 44 years of age...
Lets start off with the mention of yet another milestone in my life.... well, not only in my life, but in the life of DD. Today is her birthday and she is now officially a teenager! YIKES! Seems like only yesterday, I was suffering through 13 grueling hours of induced labor because my child kicked through the protective sac that held her suspended safely inside my taxed body. I say it was taxed because gaining 35 pounds in roughly 9 months (all in one area) caused stretch marks that bordered upon appearing like I was literally tearing my skin (not pretty and the reason I will never... ever be seen in a bikini). Heck, I was starting to think that giving birth was going to be something similar to the birth scene in the movie Alien, when the "baby" pops out through the topside of my stomach like those football players crashing through the paper circle at the beginning of the homecoming game. FYI... it is not like that. Let me give you the short version of what happened just 13 years ago...
It was bowling night for DH the night before. Obviously a reason to get plastered with multiple beers while tossing a 16 pound bowling ball down a waxed lane to knock down 10 pins. His league was meeting for this ritual for only God knows how long, but DH was nearing his limit of doing this when I informed him of his pending fatherhood.... just not yet. It was 1:00 in the morning and I woke with a wet feeling and my stomach was bouncing. Wondering what in all of God's creation was going on... I looked in my What to expect when you are expecting book and came to the conclusion that my water broke. Being a first time mom with no prior experience, I called the doctor's emergency service and was informed that I had to get to the hospital pronto. (Oh, great! I have to wake sleeping beauty to let him know). In true form, DH opens one eye and grunts something that sounded like "what". I tell him that my water broke and we need to get to the hospital. He rolls over and closes his eyes. I jab him again, he opens one eye and I tell him again. His reply was clearly, "Are you kidding me?" I tell him no as calmly as I can, calling him a putz, jab him once more and proceed to grab my already packed bag for the hospital. Both his eyes flew open and he started racing around like a lunatic with a thorn in his foot, going over his list of what he needs to do before we leave (take the dog out, go to the bathroom, and whatever else in a slightly drunken, but obviously sleepy movements in hyper-speed). I grab my coat and the car keys and work my way to the car. He comes running out, looks at me, and I tell him that I feel he is unfit to drive me anywhere because he is obviously freaking out for both of us and I wanted to get there in one piece. He agrees with my request and I got in the drivers seat, he in the passengers seat and off we went. While I was driving, I wondered why I was so calm. I should be the one freaking out, right? I never gave birth before and I really had no clue what was going to happen, but there I was.... calm, cool, and collected. We got to the hospital's ER and stopped in front of the door. I asked him kindly to at least park the car and asked him if he was able to do that simple task. He nodded his head like a bobble-head doll and went to park the car. Once inside the hospital, I was wheeled into the labor and delivery department and was placed on a nice I.V. of fluids and some labor-inducing medicines since I was not dilated to actually deliver yet. DH joins me and promptly passes out in the recliner next to my bed while that medicine started wreaking havoc on my body. With each medicine-induced contraction, I cursed like a trucker with a free pass to scream every foul-worded thought, directed at a yet again sleeping beauty that this was all his fault. While I was in agony, there were multiple doctors and nurses checking on me. Most were laughing because I was apparently hilarious with my colorful comments. I guess I was quite hilarious while in physical agony. Glad to know that everyone had fun on my account. When the paramedic-in-training walked in and asked if he could witness a live birth as part of his training, I said sure... Everyone seems to want to take a look at something I cannot see without the aid of a well-angled mirror, nor would ever want to see it. What is yet one more stranger looking where the sun should never shine and is to be held sacred, right? Go right ahead, buddy! My working parts are no longer a secret!
Long story, short... after many hours of agony, I got to hear the first sound of my daughter I named Genevieve May (Genevieve was DH's grandmother's name and May is my mother's middle name - the reason I named her after DH's grandmother is because she was the first and only person in DH's family that accepted me fully and insisted I call her Grandma when I was dating DH. We were best of friends.), called my mom (DH called his parents), and my life changed completely from that moment. I was no longer Nancy, I earned a new name.... Mom.
It is a tough job... being a mom, that is. Besides raising a pretty good kid, I also have had to raise DH (which is far harder... can't teach an old dog new tricks). No complaints, just in awe of it all. She is tall, beautiful and smart... stubborn to the core, moody and growing up far too fast. She was reminded this morning that no matter how old she gets.... she will always be my baby girl. I will be stern, but loving... silly at times and will embarrass her often (it is my job, right?). I am her mother first and will protect her with my life... then I will also be her friend that she can turn to.
Well, after sharing that... I will make this last thing short, since I have plenty of things to do today....
I got schooled last night! I decided that some exercise variation is necessary in my new years resolution of getting back to my fighting weight and took a martial arts fitness class at my daughter's martial arts school. Now, I am strong, but lack endurance. That was prevalent in last night's class. Round my be a shape, but obviously not an actively in-shape shape. After the one hour class, I was sweating like a whore in church and quite beat, but I still managed to take out the garbage before melting into the couch. That even included hauling out DD's old headboard from her room to take it to the curb. I woke up this morning to DH's mention that he was leaving for work and asked me to go to the store to get DD a card and put the $20 he handed to me in it for her since he had no clue what to get her for her birthday. Nice to see that he tries to do more for his daughter than he does for me. He did get a laugh when my first words were.... "Did you get the license plate of the truck that ran me over? That class kicked my butt." At least the rest of the week's exercising is far less intense since it consists of a treadmill, some weights, and sit-ups at a far less intense rate. I am in no means a runner in any sense of the word... yep, the turtle is me.... slow and steady with strength to carry the shell for great lengths. Well, time to mosey (with sound effects) to get this day going.... housework is on the menu for today, then back to the gym tomorrow.
Have a great day everyone!!
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