The contradiction connection.....

Yesterday's blog entry was about how people have the tendency to contradict themselves, for what I believe is their only way to constantly have a gripe over things.  Setting up a really good argument for doing, acting, or saying things a certain way is only half the battle.  Once you get someone to actually agree with that and following through without regrets is another.  Somehow, people have these grand ideas about how things are to be done, but once they see their requests being followed and it includes them in the mix, they are just not happy with the results.  Here is an example of contradictions that rub me the wrong way.....

A person tells me a secret and that nobody is to know about it.  Okay, I can keep a secret, but somehow I hear the same secret from another person about the same thing.  How is that possible?  I thought it was a secret to be kept to myself, but now someone else knows too?  What becomes even more annoying is that I get blamed for sharing the secret that I never shared in the first place.

Asking another person what they would like to do for the day is just one of those annoyances that feel like nails on a chalkboard to me.  When you ask a person what they would like to do or eat and you get a reply of, "you choose", is just a recipe of complaints-a-plenty.  I guess I cannot read minds and whatever I choose is going to be the wrong thing anyway.  I am no longer going to choose for another.  If they cannot make up their mind, well, that is their problem and not mine anymore.

How about this gem.....  I know I will be getting grief for mentioning names, so I won't, but this is where I get frustrated when it comes to sharing pictures, thoughts, ideas, jokes, or even feelings on a social site.  I was told that social sites like Facebook is just a breeding ground for danger at every turn.  I am to keep my family a secret.  My daughter is to not be posted in pictures because there are potential pedophiles stalking my wall, my husband does not want to be mentioned because if I say or show anything, it will be scrutinized.  I am given grief for showing that I happen to go out with friends (once a month) to a bar and actually have a beer.  I have gotten stern talks from people about sharing how I am feeling if it is the truth and even more stern talks about mentioning where I will be going at any given time because that just opens the door to potential dangers at every turn from being stalked to being robbed.  I do my best to oblige to their request to be more vague when I am on Facebook, but still get grief and yet get contradictory statements that I apparently was mistaken when I was told to act a certain way.  Only when it is in their best interests is when it is okay to break the rules.  Well, I just don't seem to get it... or maybe I do.

Maybe I am just an easy target for disapproval.  It could be that I prefer to respect others thoughts and feelings before my own.  Or is there a lot more people out there that have been so disappointed in life that they thrive on being miserable all the time no matter how hard I try to be reasonable?  I have heard about people being toxic, but never really thought that it would hit my circle of friends and family.  Maybe I am the toxic one....  I could be taking what I am told about proper decorum to the nth degree and I lack the ability to bend the rules from time to time.  People are entitled to change their minds, but does it have to be without changing in mid-thought?  Make a decision and stick with it, people.  Deal with the undesirable results by your decisions.  I am not a lawyer, I do not look for loopholes in the system of how to exist with various (and sometimes extreme) views of what is right and wrong in the eyes of others.  I think what I am really hoping for is a more honest existence without hidden agendas and contradictory rules.....