DH had a doctor's visit not too long ago. Well, there were 2 visits in a week to the same doctor. It was time for more blood work to be done, so one visit consisted of getting poked with a needle and the other was a visit to get the results. Gotta just love the system of how just stepping into a doctor's office consists of a co-pay requirement. Yep, the land of healthcare has its finger on the pulse of pushing the struggling down yet another peg towards having any concept of a savings account for the future.
Needless to say.... I already knew that DH was going to be put on cholesterol medications. It was just a matter of time. With his poor eating habits that center upon butter being a staple of his diet, I would have figured that this should have been done sooner than later. Oh well, what can I say? I am just a clueless wife in my husband's eyes, right? I have tried to change his eating habits for years (along with mine) and got burnt out with how our budget dictates what we can afford to eat. I have to thank my new overindulgence of reading that I have not gone off the deep end when it comes to food. When I am wrapped up in a good book... I barely eat. Sadly, starving through reading does not create a skinny person, but at least when it comes to food..... I am the cheapest one to feed in this house!
As DH tells me about his last visit with the doctor, he is holding nothing back when it came to his feelings about how the doctor has zero compassion for his patients. The criticism this doctor doles out about his weight, his cholesterol number, and anything else that he can muster up definitely slammed DH's feelings about himself. Sadly, when DH is not happy..... NOBODY IS HAPPY in our house. Well, DH decided to lay the burden of his feelings on my shoulders. As I have tried for years to get him to open up about his feelings.... I was not asking for this level of emotional baggage all at once. Apparently, men lack the ability to ease people into their level of emotions. Heck, I think I will need yet a second set of chiropractic appointments just to handle how his release of emotional frustration compressed my spine even more. Oh well, beggars cannot be choosers, right?
So, with DH all ready, willing and able to share his feelings.... I was exposed to whining that made me look like I am the stronger one in this family. The constant complaining about how the doctor is dissatisfied with DH's recent weight gain and how his cholesterol has been climbing was apparently the straw that broke the camel's back and released the floodgates of hell for me. I did find it funny that what DH whined about when it came to diet and weight loss..... I saw the similarity that women have when it comes to complaining about their weight loss journey to their spouses. Sadly, I am the one biting the bullet and listening to the constant nagging over how miserable DH is when it comes to eating in moderation. DH whined about how hard it is to lose 11 pounds over the past 2 weeks and how his attempts will never be good enough for his doctor's expectations. REALLY?!?!?!? You are worried about someone else's expectations???? Oh honey, you are preaching to the choir, here! I have been struggling to meet your expectations for years and always seem to fall short! The moment I decided to man-up and stop being such a girl, he decides to hit me with his sensitive side. Sadly, his sensitive side has zero focus on me, of course.... Yep, he is looking for a pity party from me and I just cannot give it to him....
"Well, dear," I say in the nicest tone possible, "I understand your dilemma and believe me... it is no walk in the park to lose weight and get your cholesterol in check by diet alone."
His reply was more like a quest for an answer to solve the issue at hand without changing his habits... "I just cannot see myself giving up my cheese and butter and my beer to make this person happy. I quit smoking, I take walks every night (just around the block, so you know), and I stopped going for second servings when it comes to eat. What does this whack-job, crack-pot doctor want me to do?"
I tired to stifle my sigh of resignation to his plight because I already know that no matter what I say will not mean a hill of beans anyway and figured since he never listens to me anyway..... it will not hurt to be completely candid with my answer..... "Only you can change your picky ways and do what is necessary to change your eating habits. I have tried for far too long and it is your turn to take the bull by the horns and do something about it. Our budget dictates what we can buy to eat, but it is your junk-food love that dictates what is bought. You need to go from no vegetables in your diet to eating vegetables consistently, fruit is actually good for you, but you are not the first in line to eat that stuff. You make a face when I offer you a yogurt as a snack, and if you really knew what serving size is, you would beg to be put down like "Old Yeller". Oh, and by the way, your parent's gift of bratwurst is not screaming healthy food choice, either, for fixing your car. While moderation is key, you have to realize that the choices you prefer to have exceed the daily fat, sodium, and calorie count a person should have a day when you eat more than one. You wondered why I choose ground chicken or ground turkey to make your God forsaken tacos.... well honey, that is so they can appear just a little healthier than eating the cheapest ground beef there is and that I could breathe a little easier that you can be somewhere closer to the park of eating healthier. I do care, but I am running out of ideas to help you if you are not willing to try. The ball is in your court.... you need to up yourself somewhere..... Grow up or man-up, the choice is yours. I am not your mother and I am not your doctor."
You know... with this new attitude of not getting so involved with feelings, I am starting to wonder when it is going to work in my favor because I am still getting frustrated. Either I am letting it bother me or DH found a loophole in my plan, but things have got to change. Oh well, time to get this day going. I wonder what DH has in mind for what he wants to eat for the week. I know that it won't include fruit, vegetables, yogurt or fish. Sigh, just let it go, Nance, just let it go..... Have a good one everybody!
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