Guilty moments......

As I watched the news report about what is expected to be a major snowstorm approaching, I get this overwhelming urge to crawl into bed and not even look out the window for the next few days.  I really do not mind winter and all that it offers.  I actually like wearing sweaters, hooded sweatshirts, jeans, and coats.  The bigger and bulkier, the better, I always say.  If you have not figured out by now, I am not really proud of my body.  You would never see me at a nudist colony, and if you do...  call 9-1-1 because I have been drugged into oblivion and will need medical assistance.  I have made a commitment to improve my serious image flaws, but my guilty little pleasures (beer, chocolate, soda pop, sweets and junk food to name a few), really like to cling onto me and not let go.  Giving them up completely is out of the question, but if I can control how much I have, I would not doubt that the skinny girl inside that is screaming to get out would make an appearance.... eventually.  No, I am not HUGE, but I am not comfortable with showing my curves.  Some of those curves are in the wrong places.  Society has made it clear about what is considered beautiful and sadly, it affects every girl in the world.  Men have it so much easier.  They just do not care.  Well, maybe they do a little, but with their metabolisms, they can become sculpted and chiseled masterpieces with little effort.  Women, on the other hand can try to live on food only a rabbit would eat and still not lose an ounce.

Unless... We exercise like there is no tomorrow.....

I am not one to really enjoy being at the gym for hours on end.  I get a little bored there.  Sure, there is a lot you can do.  There are classes you can take with instructors named Barbie that make exercising look like second nature to them.  I don't think I have ever seen one really sweat, so the thought that they are human becomes less and thinking that they are cyborgs or androids seems more plausible.  I am not the most graceful creature that has walked this Earth, either.  I remember taking a yoga class once.... just once.  I managed to knock a clock off the wall while everyone else in the room is being Zen, and all.  Having everyone lose focus on the requested pose to focus on my bumblings makes me feel real uncomfortable ever going back.  That one bad experience pretty much put the Kibosh in trying aerobics....  Zero coordination, remember?  My choice of exercise...  the machines.  Treadmill, elliptical, and circuit.  I look less of a retard and I am okay with that.  Won't use the stair master or the stationary bike.  If I want to climb stairs or ride a bicycle, I would prefer to be getting somewhere and use the real deal.

I guess that is why when winter comes along, I really don't mind the snow.  Well, for a while that is.  Give me a month, maybe two, and that white fluffy stuff can melt away.  Shoveling snow can be easy or it can be hard work.  It is all in how you do it.  I prefer to shovel just for the satisfaction of a clear driveway and walkway, but in hindsight, it is great exercise.  Sadly, with a bad back issue that I have been dealing with for years, getting my cold weather exercise on is a crap shoot if I will or won't be spending at least an hour with an ice pack and downing Advil like tic-tacs.  I am too stubborn to listen to myself and shovel anyway knowing the risks.  Getting a cold is the least of my worries in comparison to feeling incapacitated from a pinched nerve.

I just have a guilty feeling this morning about not being out there shoveling at the crack of dawn.  My husband hates the snow and would prefer to not shovel.  I think that is why he enjoys the pleasure of having a wife that will do the shoveling without complaining.  Well, this morning, there was about an inch or two (maybe more, I did not check with a ruler out there this morning) on the driveway.  My husband took it upon himself to shovel this morning.  I am thankful he did.  It is just that I knew he was out there.  I woke up and saw that he was out there, shoveling all alone.  He was about half way done and I could have easily gone out there and joined him, but I was not feeling "it".  I went back to sleep, played dumb when he woke me up to tell me that he is leaving for work, and even pretended that it was not shoveled and offered to go out there and help him.  My acting abilities were on point this morning.  He said he did the shoveling and I thanked him.  At least the thanking him was honest and not an act.  After he left, I felt bad that I avoided the one thing I have been responsible for all this winter season.  I do have a sinus infection, so I should be given a little leeway in my enthusiasm to shovel again, and again, and again over the next 48 hours or so.

So, this is my confession of the day.  May the penance for my guilty moment of laziness be less than what the weather channel has predicted when it comes to shoveling that happy, fluffy, white mess that has come to town...... PEACE!